When retired swimmer Michael Klim first made a big splash, I remember reading that all the milk companies were desperate to sign him up as a spokesperson. Klim being ‘milk’ backwards. As far as I know, he never did put his face to a milk brand. Possibly because he was thinking ahead to his post-swimming career, and wanting to keep ‘Milk’ as his own brand. Which it now is. Yesterday he launched his new venture: Milk skincare for men. And yep that’s me, doing the starstruck fan thing in the middle of an otherwise cool Sydney restaurant. But I actually was really impressed - this is a serious business, and great skincare.

Many celebrities whack their name on any old product these days. And not all associations make sense. Actually, an ex-swimmer and skincare aren’t exactly the most obvious pairing. But then again, swimming is one of the harshest environments for skin. And it turned out to be what inspired Michael (yes, first-name basis now!) to dip his toe into the industry. “I could never find anything that worked for my skin,” Michael told us. So - as you do - he decided to make his own products. About two years ago, he gathered a team around him and started sourcing ingredients (such as algae, from the French west coast) and testing various mixes. The result: a body wash, an exfoliating cleanser, and a sunscreen moisturiser, all launching in Myer nationally in August (with more products to follow). “It’s my livelihood now, I’m taking it very seriously,” he told us. And when an Olympic gold-medal winner says that, you can be pretty sure he means business.

Unless you’re happy with headscarf, I don’t have one simple, single answer for you, but a bit of a to-do checklist. Ready for it? Okay here goes … First of all make sure you’re using shampoo and conditioner specifically formulated for your hair type. Curly hair has a compromised cuticle layer, which allows for moisture to get into hair - this is what’s causing the frizz. Therefore haircare for curly hair works to keep that cuticle sealed. Try to wash your hair in cold water – or at least give it a final chilly rinse – as this will also tighten up the cuticle… A silicone serum (such as John Frieda’s original Frizz Ease) will also keep that barrier sealed, as well as define and weigh down your curls. For best results, comb the serum through dripping-wet hair then carefully wrap in a towel (avoid brushing or excessive towelling, as this friction will ruffle up the cuticle)… If you can bear it, leave hair to totally air-dry, otherwise waft a diffuser through curls until they’re almost dry (excessive heat styling can also mess up curly hair), and – last to-do, I promise - mist over a hairspray to lock everything down.

The Look: English Rose skin.
The Low-Down: Porcelain-pale skin shows up marks and blemishes so much that you may as well draw red circles around them. So, carrying off such a complexion requires a vigilant skincare routine. Key in the mix: a brightening serum, to inhibit excess melanin production and keep skin even-toned and bright.
The Lust-After: Ultraceuticals Even Skintone Serum, $85 from Adore Beauty

This was the question posed to me yesterday, when an email from Playboy Beauty poppied into my inbox. Was I a) a Holly-esque glamour girl with pink glossy lips, b) a Bridget-style beach babe with shimmery bronze cheeks, or c) a Kendra-type tomboy? Answer: um, none of the above. I do have to admit that one of my guilty pleasures is watching The Girls of the Playboy Mansion. But I’m pretty sure it’s not rubbing off on my beauty regimen. My fake tan collection is currently collecting cobwebs, for one. And as for the blonde - I’ve actually started going darker via some lowlights.

But I will admit this: I’ve recently been wondering what it would be like to have a bit more going on in the boob department. Not to Playboy proportions (which reminds me: my friend was recently in the Mansion interviewing the girls, when Kendra toppled over and literally bounced up and down on her breasts). But just a B cup would be nice to take out for a test-run.

Which may actually soon be possible. Some of you may have heard of Macrolane, a form of Restylane (you know, the stuff that plumps up lips and lines) that is currently being used overseas for a temporary boob job. Basically the cosmetic or plastic surgeon injects the hyaluronic acid (a non-animal synthetic form of the hydrating substance we have naturally in our bodies) into the breast, where it stays for up to a year, until it’s broken down and metabolised out of the system. It’s set for release in Australia some time next year.

So you know that question: which girl next door are you? Perhaps ask me again in twelve months’ time.